Blogging & Thoughts

Shortform thoughts & posts in the spirit of old-school blogging

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The list of reasons we are scared to quit our jobs

October 4, 2018 in Fear, Quitting, Thoughts

There are many forces us keeping us in a state of misery that are challenging to unpack.  Here are some ideas from people I’ve worked with:

  • Identity: We define ourselves as workers, as someone that “doesn’t quit,” as someone that works hard
  • Relationships: We are scared that people will not accept us if we step into an unknown path and don’t have answers for where we are headed
  • Belonging: We don’t feel part of anything except our company or work community
  • Biological: We mistake comfort for safety and try to avoid the feeling of discomfort
  • Inertia: It is easier to do what we did yesterday than to imagine a different possibility
  • Emotional Pressure: We want to please the people we work with and our broader network
  • Financial Realities: We literally will run out of money if we don’t work for a month
  • Future potential money Fears: We cannot overcome the feeling that we will always need “more” and spend a lot of time imagining the worst case scenario (“what if I get sick?” etc…)
  • Time-based economic pressure: “If I stay only six more months I’ll get my next bonus”
  • Meaning: We find a lot of meaning at work and are not sure what could replace it

What else would you add?

Beyond Victimhood

June 14, 2018 in Thoughts

If you look for someone to blame for something you are unhappy with, you will find it.  Life is messy and people will wrong you.  People will make mistakes.

The future of work is about unleashing our minds from the role of victim.

I spent ten years working for large organizations.  If you spend significant time in a large organization, it is a guarantee that you will be a victim of some injustice big or small.  In fact, I believe that large modern organizations will destroy your motivation and hold you back as a default.  So if your lens is “who is to blame?” – you will find plenty of people to fill that role.

While some people truly are victims, most are lured by the ease and comfort of the mindset.

If you survive childhood and go to college, it is impossible for your parents or teachers to give you every piece of vital information you need to navigate the world. Our world is too complex, complicated and changing.

Instead of blaming our parents, our university, our managers or our friends for failing to tell us what we needed to know, we have another choice. While the internet has thrown some people into a modern mania of shame and blame, it also gives us access to better ideas, great people, and positive communities.

There are millions of teachers ready to show you a new way of thinking or doing something on YouTube.  I took a course called “Learning How To Learn” on Coursera and it blew my mind and changed how I thought about teaching and my own habits.  It is one of the most interesting courses I’ve taken in my academic career, but I didn’t have to pay any tuition for it.  It was free.

It is much more comfortable to blame others or create stories why others can do things and you cannot.

“She had the right experience”

“He graduated from the right university”

“They had well-off parents”

Those statements admit defeat. Some people are victims, but in this world, you can also be a victim and take action.

Those people that look like they have the advantages?  Perhaps they chose love over blame.

…and then what?

June 12, 2018 in Goals, Thoughts

Yesterday I was having a conversation with someone who was a bit lost in their career.  They weren’t sure what they wanted to do next but were quite certain about what the end goal would be: $10 million of assets.

I asked the next question.  “…and then what?”

a pause.

“well then I could do whatever the heck I wanted”

“You just got a year of severance. Can’t you do that now?”

“damn you”

There is always more to do.  We are never fully done.  The choice to live can be made at any time.  You have higher odds of making it happen today.  You can never be sure if you’ll even make it to that magical endpoint.